The Soul Of Solomon

This is a new story I'm starting. A new chapter, and I'm naming it after the one thing I really lack right now. Hope. I've been told, and I've read ,seen and heard that the true evidence of hope is when it's hardest to have it. I had lost hope in people, in myself and mostly in the existence of love in the world. I was really done with all of it, and I was ready to turn over a cynical new leaf in life. But a few friends of mine have shown me that even in the darkest night, light still shines through. So in honor of the gift that they've given me, I'm starting this new story, and I'm going to call it "Letters to Hope". This is going to be my way of holding on to the hope that they've given me, and my way of documenting my wait. And it's also going to be my test, to display hope when it's hardest to have it. So please follow me on my journey as I wait for my "Hope" to arrive. Please check out day one of the journey 😁

Hey there, I'm here seated at my laptop, typing and looking for words to put in this letter to you. So maybe I'll tell you a little story , one that explains why I'm doing something that seems mad to an ordinary onlooker. This month of September 2022 has been a weird one to say the least. I expected my life to turn out way differently, I had made all these plans and preparations. I had hope, lots of it for things to go the way I wanted them to. But little by little, piece by piece, everything fell apart. You can imagine how devastated I was. My hope was shattered to say the least, and all that I had done, leading up to that point seemed like wasted time. I beat myself up over it for a good few weeks, honestly even now, I still feel that sting of having lost something very dear to me. Now normally , this is the point where I go bawling about it and complaining till kingdom come. But if I've learnt something in my few months in campus, light really does exist at the ...

Hello there We haven't spoken in a while. Really, truly, honestly talked. I apologize for this. I know I can't go back in time or make it disappear. I'm here today to try to at least partially make it right. I lack the words to tell you that I have no idea how to proceed. I think I do, but I'm simply reluctant to admit it. I just want to get to know you better. I've been putting this off for a long time because I convinced myself that if I ignored you and focused on everything and everyone else, the problem would miraculously disappear. To be honest, I was being quite selfish and naïve by doing that. By doing this, I disregarded your problems, screams for assistance, requests for pardon, and—most importantly—your need for love. I constantly advised others to improve themselves and pay attention to their needs, and I tried my best to assist them. So why didn't I place you at the top of that list? Perhaps I was reluctant to accept you for who you are. If that didn...

I've been believing this lie, the one that says I must be flawless in order to be near you. The deception that caused me to question my self-worth and my love for you. I wanted to get these pieces of myself in the right places, so I wouldn't have to go through healing phases when I'm with you. Yet you were the healing I needed all along. The quiet and safe spaces you provided me with, where I could simply be, Where I lay out my pieces and you didn't judge them based on how they appeared, but instead saw them for what they could be, gave me hope that maybe, just maybe, we could be. Just You and I. I know I was selfish because I didn't see, or perhaps I chose not to see, that you had your own pieces. You had wounds that needed to be healed. I know I should have done something, when you tried to show me and tell me what you were going through. But even if all I can do is hold your hand for the rest of our lives, I'll still choose you. And if you're br...